Draw Into the Circle

Why Circles?

by Cindy Sas

“The work carried out in brotherly harmony within our groups has quite a different significance for the spiritual world than other work we may undertake.” Rudolf Steiner

As a member of three circles currently (Heartland, Karma & Biography, and Research), I’m continually amazed by the richness of these gatherings. Like everyone, my life is busy and full, and yet I find myself wanting to increase my engagement in Circles. I want more of what they have to offer.

Every Circle in which I’ve participated is different, but what I’ve experienced in every one of them are the qualities for which training and work within Biography and Social Art uniquely prepares us:

The Circles are collegial, rather than hierarchical. We share the role of leadership, to greater or lesser degrees. Personally, I’m not comfortable with taking a leadership role. I don’t know what to do, or how to do it. And I certainly don’t want the weight that comes from being responsible for administrative tasks, content creation, and facilitation that are a part of meeting regularly. But with shared leadership, I can focus on where my strengths lie (creative ideas, note taking and allow others to carry the tasks for which they are best suited. Rotating leadership for content among members increases individual engagement and builds confidence – both in one’s ability to hold a group for ninety minutes, and also in learning that others are actually interested in what you have to say.

In Circles we discover our commonalities, that we are not alone in what we feel or what we struggle with. This has been almost eerily demonstrated in the Heartland Circle. We’ve been meeting monthly for nearly eleven years. As our Circle has evolved and grown, our way of working together has loosened up considerably. Early on, we were very formed in choosing a particular theme that we worked with over the course of a year. More recently, we simply begin with a check-in and find that we often have had very similar experiences, questions, or struggles since we’d last met. Our theme arises organically out of the check-in. There’s a kind of trust that builds in this loosening up. We trust the process; we trust our ability to move with what is. The form that we relied on when we were a “younger” group is second nature now, quietly supportive. 

In Circles we have the opportunity to speak the unspeakable, and have it received without judgment. For me, this was most clearly demonstrated in the Trauma Transformation Circle (recently concluded), but also in the Karma and Biography Circle. It feels safe enough in these Circles to share even very difficult, very painful aspects of our Biographies, and what is shared is simply held by the Circle. There is none of the usual offering of advice or trying to fix or make it better. The simple holding is healing. This has taught me a lot about what’s actually needed, especially for soul healing. Deep listening and acceptance go a long way.

In Circles we have the opportunity to work through conflict and disagreement. We learn that in the working through, we become stronger and closer as a group. I’m a peacemaker and a conflict avoider, so this has been a big learning for me. I’m grateful for those in the Circle who model courage, who can speak the things (often hard to hear) that have bothered them or hurt them, or the ways they perceive that the group relationship could be improved. Slowly, I’m learning to speak up when things have bothered or hurt me, or when I see things that might need to change. This invites me to transform a lifelong pattern of behavior – staying silent when I need to speak up. Others are being asked to change in different ways – for example, learning to stay rather than flee when they experience something painful or disappointing within the Circle.

Circles allow for, and support, transformation. It’s a source of great awe for me how this happens so consistently. When I “remember a time when…”; capture the moment artistically; share with others; and receive reflections, questions, and observations from those who have listened deeply to my sharing, new possibilities arise. My perspective shifts. I see things in a new way. I change how I have habitually thought about a situation, a relationship, a person, a way of being. I am transformed. We call this metanoia– change of heart and mind – and it is common when we engage in deep Circle work.

In Circles we each listen to the other and feel ourselves listened to. In listening – in the way we are taught to listen as Biography Workers – we practice selflessness. We set aside our own thoughts, judgments, the scripts for what we’ll say when it’s our turn to speak. We give our undivided attention to the other. How often do you experience this opportunity both to listen and be listened to, outside of Biography Work? If you’ve ever experienced the wonder and beauty of being listened to in this way then you understand that this is perhaps the greatest gift that Circles can offer.

Steiner said, “Love starts when we push aside our ego and make room for someone else." John 15:13 says, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” I grew up in a strict religious family and always thought of this too literally, like I’d have to physically die for my friends in order to demonstrate the kind of love I longed to give. But when we set aside our own thoughts, when we refrain from engaging in the judgment that comes naturally to us, when we shift our focus of attention from ourselves to the other, is that not also a “laying down of one’s life,” a “pushing aside of our ego”? 

Circles, then, are offering a practice in how to love, and how to be loved. Is it any wonder that I find myself longing for more of them? Is there any doubt about how much they are needed, and what they have to offer? Does this not explain how “(t)he work carried out in brotherly harmony within our groups has quite a different significance for the spiritual world than other work we may undertake”?